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Writer's pictureStephanie Valdez

Reclaiming Parts of Self

Updated: May 27, 2020

My experience growing up in chaos and uncertainty was that of survival. I learned very quickly the art of self preservation. I would rather alter my personality to blend in with whatever experience was happening around me. To stay quiet and complacent. I became very comfortable not being seen, not being heard, not knowing that my needs were important.

Fast forward 39 years and I have just spent the past two years extricating myself out of an oppressive relationship of 16 years. I do not blame my ex partner for this experience. As I said, I was very comfortable not being seen, not being heard, and not having my needs honored. If there is one lesson I learned over these past 2 years, I will never give up my power again. I will never allow my authentic self to not be seen, to not be heard. I have done nothing but provide the space and awareness for her to retrieve those aspects of self that she forgot, that she locked away in order to protect herself. Retrieving aspects of self has been both joyful and painful. There have been many dark nights of the soul and fun days full of dancing. From growing my own food, to listening to the music I love, to honoring my desires, to cooking meals learned in my Abuela's kitchen. I know that I am on a long journey of remembering and honoring those aspects of myself that I lost so long ago. It is messy and it is beautiful, yet I cannot wait to see what else I uncover, what other aspects of self I get to meet! #womenempowerment #soulretrieval #selfactualization #traumasurvivor #indigenoushealing #mindbody #meditation #selfawarness #stephvvaldez


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